Becoming the Man God Intended: An Introduction to On Target Institute

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Explore how you can be fully alive, becoming the man God intended. This is On Target with Vince D'Acchioli. Vince D'Acchioli here, it is so good to be with you. As we were looking at the history of On Target Ministries, we've decided that by and large the Lord has done some incredible things over all of these years, but the most special thing that He's done is the development of On Target Institute, where we are dedicated to producing curriculum-driven, process-driven strategies in order for men to become all that God intended. I'll tell you more about that in just a moment.

But when we sat down to talk about our new vision, I was asked the question, Vince, what is it that you think men will really resonate with as they look over our material? And it occurred to me that when I think of my own life, the things that I get passionate about, what brings tears to my eyes is the thought of the day when I might be standing before my Savior, and He would say the words to me, well done, good and faithful servant. I don't know about you, but I don't know of any man really that doesn't desire to hear those words. Well, as we began to unpack that, we began to realize that in order to hear those words, men, all of us, ultimately need to become, now get this, the man that God intended. The man God intended.

So that led to the development of our vision. Our vision statement is really, really simple, becoming the man God intended. Our inspiration came from the really foundational verse for on-target ministries, and really what is my life verse? It's taken from Philippians 3, 13 and 14, where the apostle Paul says these words. He says, brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.

In other words, I haven't arrived, and by the way, none of us will, on this side of heaven. But he says this, one thing I do, now get this, forgetting what is behind, and straining toward what is ahead. He says, I press on toward the goal, the mark, the target. That's where the name on-target came from. In order, he says, to win the prize for which God has called me.

In other words, God has destined me. God has an intention for my life. That's what Paul is saying. He wants to win that prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Our mission for on-target institute is this, to facilitate growth through learning resources, so that godly men will influence their families, churches and cultures for Christ.

Now, that is the foundation upon which everything we're doing at on-target institute is being built. Let me, with that as a backdrop now, move into another section of this first introductory lesson, because what we really want to do here is break the ice. If you're in a group with a number of other men, this is going to be a session where we can kind of get to know each other before we move on and really drill down into the curriculum that we're about to enter into. I want to ask you a question. What is the most valuable thing that you own in your whole life?

Now, obviously, I can't be present with you to get a response from you, but I can tell you what most people would begin thinking. Oftentimes, it would have to do with maybe it's my relationship with God, maybe it's my relationship with my family, or things maybe that I own. But honestly, the most valuable thing that you own in your life is your story. It's the story of what God has done especially in your life. Let me tell you a little bit about my story, kind of as an example of what we're going to have you do here in just a few moments as we close this session.

I was born in Rhode Island in 1945. I was a young Italian guy born in this huge Italian family. I got spoiled by my grandmas and grandpas because I was the first born in my dad's generation. When I was eight years old, my family left Rhode Island and went to California to visit my mom's relatives for two weeks. Well, we never went back to Rhode Island and as a little boy, I was wondering what's going on here?

Why aren't we going back? I didn't find out till I was 15 years old that mom and dad were running from the law. I had no idea. What happened was they put me into the Catholic school system because I was this out of control little guy. I was kind of spoiled rotten.

I wanted my way. I needed discipline, so they put me in the Catholic school system. In those days, corporal punishment was in and they really liked it. I got beat up all the time, the sisters and the nuns. When I got into high school, it was the brothers.

They wore the full robes and when they would hit you, they would hit you closed fist. I mean, it was a serious, serious deal. Back in those days, they could get away with that. You couldn't do that much today. Even though I complained about some of that stuff, I want to tell you something, but for some of the discipline that got through, I don't know where I would be today.

That's kind of the way I grew up. I also had all the wrong role models that I surrounded myself with. I got into the business world and then in California, I actually had an uncle Louis. My uncle Louis was busted by the highest level people in the government at that time. He was the real mafia deal.

In fact, if you go to our website, if you want to go to otm.co, there's a video area on the website. There's actually a half an hour television program that was done on my life and my background because it was pretty colorful. But anyway, I had the wrong role models and I grew up around that. And so when I finally met my wife Cindy, it was in high school. I got kicked out of the Catholic high school and I went to the public school for the first time and met my lovely wife Cindy.

She's the first person in the history of my family that was an Italian. And if you've ever seen my big fat Greek wedding, well, you've met my family. But what happened is we got together and psychologists would say a winner-loser pattern began to develop. A winner-loser pattern happens when one person's personality in a relationship suffocates the personality of the other person. And that's what was happening.

I was suffocating her. I was domineering. I was prideful. And we brought that unhealthy relationship into our early years of marriage, so much so that we struggled for a long time. My wife actually came to know the Lord before me through her brother who accepted Jesus back in the 60s.

And when I found out that she had accepted the Lord, I was upset. I didn't want anything to do with it. But she was smart enough not to put any pressure on me. What she did do was she went out and got about 950 million people praying for me. I didn't have a chance and I didn't know it.

Well, we kept living our life that way. She was living her life and I was living my life. And there was something about her that looked different. She seemed happy and secure and she seemed like she was hitting on all cylinders. And that kind of annoyed me.

And so I decided to go with her one time to a meeting she'd been attended with friends at an old converted sorority house in UCLA. It was called a lightened powerhouse and a young man at that time by the name of Hal Lindsey would speak there. And so I went there and it just blew me away. I had never experienced anything like this. And over time as Hal began to unpack the Bible, which I never really knew anything about, over time it really impacted me to the point where one day as I was driving home, I decided to give my life to the Lord.

And of course my wife is ecstatic when I did that. But she would tell you if she were here that the next eight years would become a living nightmare. Because listen guys, here's what happened. I accepted Jesus as my Savior, not my Lord. And there is a huge difference.

I had heaven insurance depending upon where you are theologically, but I didn't allow him to be Lord of my life for another eight years. There are two gods. Over here is a God that we want. Over here is the God who is. And listen guys, they are not the same God.

You pursue this God at your peril. Well, that's the God I wanted until I finally crashed and burned in a hotel room in Dallas, Texas. My wife called me one day and she had found out every dirty lie of my life. All the womanizing, all the lying, the cheating and stealing. And I had no choice but to either get my life in order or lose everything.

I decided to get my life in order. We began to go to church. I really began to get serious. We got involved in a marriage class and our lives have never been the same. There's a lot more to my story, but let me just pause there for a moment.

And before you get into telling your story, let me just share with you quickly elements of an effective story. Because it's very important that you understand this as you're going to go around your tables now and discuss a little bit about your past. Keep it short. Number one, when you're telling your story, keep it short. This next one is very important.

Focus more on who you are. You noticed that in my story, I didn't get into my business world experience or anything that I did. That can come out later on in conversations as you get to know each other. But right now, who are you? How did you grow up?

Tell a little bit about your family and a little bit about how you think and how you feel. Talk about those kinds of things. More than what you do, as I said. And then highlight special experiences, like I just did. Highlights in your story where you kind of got a particular and very special kind of message.

Maybe something that God has done in your life. Maybe God hasn't done much in your life right now. Maybe you're searching whatever it might be. Just share some of those experiences as you go around your table and talk a little bit about who you are. Now, let me say this.

This is very important. What you're about to do is you're going to break the ice a little bit. You need to be very responsible for the time that you're going to take in order to do this. Because depending upon the schedule that you may be working with, you may have four or five, six guys in your group. And if everybody takes five or 10 minutes, you're probably not going to have the time to do this.

But so be thoughtful and make sure that you give an opportunity for everybody at your table to be able to share. And listen, listen. The definition of listening, guys, is simply this. Wanting to hear. This is important for us to remember when we're listening to our wives as well.

It's just its desire to want to hear what the other person has to say. There's something so powerful about listening to other people's stories as it has implication on all of our lives. The enemy would say to you that your particular issue is your particular issue. Nobody suffers with that. Let me tell you something, guys.

That's a lie. We're all struggling with the same kinds of things. And we don't take comfort in that, but we take comfort in the fact that we can do life together and really make a difference. So until we start our curriculum, until the next session, may God richly bless you on target ministries is on the air. Thanks to the generous support of our faithful partners and friends, your pay it forward gift of any amount makes it possible to get this practical discipleship teaching to men around the globe.

Please send your tax deductible donation to on target ministries at otm.co. That's otm.co.