Finding God: Justifying Dysfunctional Choices and Infidelity

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I was pursuing a God that would agree with me. I was pursuing a God that understood that if I had a hard day at work, and I just needed to feel mellow, that I would justify being able to go out and take drugs or drink alcohol. And I would even say surely God would understand. That wasn't the God who is, that's a God I wanted. My wife was pregnant, and we weren't able to be intimate, and I would say I just need to have release.

And I found all sorts of dysfunctional ways of getting release, including being unfaithful. And I would find incredible ways to justify it. And even in my company, you know, I would say, well, you know, obviously my company has lots of money. And I would justify that. I could take some things or steal, literally.

I'd work my expense account. For personal reasons, I would use the expense account for stuff that had nothing to do with business. More of the Men On Target series with Vince Dacchioli at otm.co.