Session 3: Commitment (The 5 C’s Of Biblical Manhood)

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Alright, guys, I'm going to go live here a little early. I'm a little early with our live stream a couple minutes, but I thought it would allow me some time to encourage those of you who may be tuning in to start to leave some comments so that I know you're here before I get started. I am, for whatever reason, having difficulty scheduling Facebook lives. I go in and I try to get it to schedule, and it just doesn't want to do it, and when it does schedule, it doesn't want to start on time, so I don't know what I'm doing wrong. But then most of you guys know I am technologically illiterate, so anyway, are you doing it?

So good to be with you. I'm just really enjoying the opportunity to come before our audience here on Facebook, and I know that these videos are also going to my YouTube channel, and we're finding that our outreach right now has just been amazing, and I'll tell you, it's such a blessing to me personally to be able to do this. I mean, I really enjoy going out. I mean, as many of you know, I've been going out speaking for the last 30, 40 years, everything from huge Promise Keeper rallies and stadiums to little bitty events and small little churches all across America, really the world for that matter, and it is really nice. But now, because it's really harder and harder to get out, and events are less likely to be scheduled these days, which is probably a good thing.

I coined a phrase many years ago that I really believe in our culture, we have a tendency to event people to death, and we have this idea that somehow just having somebody attend an event is going to be a life-changing experience, and I'm not suggesting for a moment that there aren't some people that do attend events that do have life-changing experiences, but for the most part, I really believe in the quote that I came up with years ago, and that is that it takes a relational environment in order for truth to become transformational, and so in our ministry for the last probably, I don't know, 15, 20 years, we've been trying to create healthy relational environments around good teaching, good curriculum, but mostly around other men or couples that will lovingly be there and hold each other accountable. That's where life change really, really takes place. So again, if you're just joining in, this is our third of what will be five sessions, we're going to continue every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for the foreseeable future at 10 a.m. mountain time. We're going to continue to do these brief little teachings, but we're in a series right now that I've titled The Five Seves of Biblical Manhood, and I'm considering writing a book on this subject.

I really believe that it may be one of the best definitions of biblical manhood I've ever seen. I'd like to take credit for putting it all together myself. I came up with, I think, three of The Five Seves, and there were a couple of other folks that helped me kind of unpack this and turn it into the messages that you're being exposed to right now, and we're also developing a whole curriculum around these Five Seves as well. So let me go ahead and get into it. The first two of The Five Seves were godly compassion and godly conviction, the idea that you have to go through these seas in the proper order, compassion, conviction, commitment today, compassion, conviction, commitment, confidence, and courage.

We're going to do confidence and courage next, but what I've been saying is that you have to process through these things in this order, and if you don't do that, the next one is a very, very difficult thing to come by. You have to be a man of godly compassion before you can become a man of godly conviction. And by the way, when I say man, this is men or women. This is not a gender specific kind of a teaching, but what I do mostly is teach men. So you'll find me using that terminology more often, but godly compassion is knowing God intimately, loving God and loving others.

And as I get to know God, read the word and understand more and more about who he is, I can form godly convictions. If you have not seen those two sessions, you can scroll down in this feed, or you can go to our YouTube channel, and you can pick up on those to get caught up. So godly commitment, though, is something totally different. I have often heard pastors say, I can't seem to get my men committed. And I really believe the reason for that is we haven't really brought the men through the first two stages.

You find a man that has godly compassion and results in godly conviction, you won't have a problem with godly commitment. It's almost a natural byproduct. Now, let me let me kind of unpack the term commitment for just a moment. Years ago, I developed a teaching around what I called the five stages or the six stages, actually, the sixth one is the result, but the six stages of growth that you have to go through six stages. The first three stages are what I call the cycle of hopelessness.

Let me explain the first three stages are event, awareness, decision. Watch this now. What's an event? Event could be right now. You're watching this video.

This is an event, a promise keeper rally could be an event, a seminar that you attend reading a book is an event. Listen, a wedding is an event. It is not a marriage. So you go to an event. And when you're at the event, it may be it creates some awareness.

I go to this event and I heard this Delac, a lucha loli guy speaking, you know, and, and, you know, I become aware that something needs to happen. So I make a decision. Well, by golly, starting Monday, I'm going to be a different guy. I mean, that's like going up to the mountains for a retreat, coming off the mountaintop and making a decision. I'm going to start Monday and I'm going to I'm going to do this diets.

Same, same way. I remember my dad bought me my first set of weights, you know, and I went with a little tiny kid, you know, and I went and I pumped them for about 20, 20, 20 minutes, you know, and went over to the, went over to the, to the mirror, took off my shirt and what's going on here? There's nothing going on. I'm kind of impatient. I want the result right now, you know, event, New Year's Eve is an event.

I am aware that I'm a little overweight, not a shape. I make a decision New Year's Day to go on diet and start working out. Well, New Year's Day comes and guess what? The wife is making chili and garlic bread. Well, I'll start tomorrow.

And so it becomes a cycle of hopelessness, event, awareness, decision. Now watch this. Commitment is the next phase. Commitment is the bridge you must cross to transform the old man into the new man. Commitment is with every fiber of your being committing to a new course of action.

If you look up the difference between decision and commitment in the dictionary, it'll blow you away. So when, now when I make the commitment, then the next stage is the hardest process. Process is, you know, behavioral change over time, that the weights aren't going to produce that change the first time you use them. You're going to have to submit yourself to a process and that's the, that's the stage we don't like very well. We're going to be talking about that more as we get into this teaching, but process.

And then ultimately, if we go through these six stages, the six stages actually change. So if I commit to something and I enter a process for change, ultimately the change will occur. So commitment is huge. Okay. I've got a quote here and I don't remember where it came from.

It I might have come up with this, but it doesn't sound like me. But here's what it says. Commitment is the stuff character is made of the power to change the face of things is the daily triumph of integrity over skepticism. Well, what does this look like in action commitment? I like to say is I haven't understood that there when you're a committed person, you understand your word is your bond, you will not sacrifice self, you know, you will not sacrifice to or compromise anything that you have said that you're going to do you were committed commit commitment is also has to do with obedience.

I'm not giving into temptation. And this is the big one guys, because this is where we fail most of the time I make I make a I make a commitment that I'm not going to do those things or if I make a decision not to do I make a decision by the way I'm not I'm not going to look at porn anymore. I'm not going to eat that sugar anymore that or I'm not going to say these jokes anymore whatever it might be. Okay, I can make a decision but a commitment is very different. A commitment brings us to the point where you know what I know how who I am and the Lord and I know what God has out in front of me and but I'm I am not going to do this anymore.

You know, they say the Apollo moonshot was off course 90% or 95% of the time it was off course. The only reason the Apollo moonshot was able to hit its final destination is that along the way mission control would fire off these little things called retro rockets. So the minute it would start to drift off course the retro rocket they'd fire it and it would get back on course again. Well, I like to say that obedience is the retro rocket for life because listen to me dear ones, our lives are off course probably 95% of the time and we need to be firing off those retro rockets to stay on course. Will I will I resist the temptation over here to do the things I know are bad for me?

Will I not entertain those ideas over here and as I fire these retro rockets off and make a commitment I keep my life on track on on focus. Oswald Chambers in his October 10th devotional, he says this he says God will sometimes not reveal more truth about himself. Listen until you've obeyed what you already know. So that's a profound statement guys and if you're if you're desiring more and more truth from God and you're wondering why maybe it's not being revealed to you maybe ask yourself the question could it be I'm not merely making a commitment to keep my life pure and to stay on the right track because what I have found is the more I do that the more I lean into that the more God reveals his truth to me. So are you committed to the cause of Christ in the great commandment?

That's a big commitment the great commandment Matthew 28 18 to 20 he says this what he's saying to us guys all authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me therefore go and make what? Disciples listen not people that you're trying to convert to your way of thinking. Disciples of all nations baptizing them in the name of the father and the son of the Holy Spirit and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you and surely I am with you always to the very end of the age. Jesus is calling us to make a commitment to that to make sure our lives stand for getting out there and doing everything we can to advance his kingdom. Also if you're going to be a man or woman of godly commitment you you put no conditions on love you put no conditions on love you're going to love the way Jesus loved that's real commitment how many of you know that's what people are desperate for in the world today they want to know that they're loved no matter who they are where they've been what they've done they want to know that they're loved you know Cindy and I grew up in a different generation we were married in 1965 and we came out of the the builder generation and I never once heard my mom and dad ever talk about the D word divorce never and you know in our entire 55 years of marriage Cindy and I have never ever used the D word but today guys I mean it is everywhere if someone does even something slightly wrong we're threatening each other with separation or with divorce but that was never the case before why because we made a commitment we made a commitment when we when we said I do we didn't say I'll try we I do or I do meant I I am going to I'm going to do what my vows are saying and we stuck to it we made commitments but today nobody does this anymore everybody's wandering around looking for the the newest fad or the newest cool idea and commitments are very very hard to come by but guys before god this is so important for us to be able to make commitments and again a reminder if you're not in the word if you're not intimate with god if you don't have godly compassion and if all of that isn't leading you to godly conviction what I'm suggesting to you right now is going to be very very very difficult if you're asking the question I struggle with commitment I don't know why I would encourage you to go back to the first two and start practicing them start getting closer to god start asking god to give you his vision and his love for other people and and and it won't take you long before you have godly commitment so in the context of marriage by the way our model is found in Ephesians 5 25 to 30 a man of a man of godly commitment believes in Ephesians 5 and does what Jesus modeled it says the husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy cleansing her by the washing with water through the word and to present her to himself as a radiant church okay without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish but holy and blameless in this same way he says husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies he who loves his wife loves himself after all no one ever hated his own body but he feeds and cares for it just as Christ does the church for we are members of one body we are called especially as men the term is husband men all the way back to the to Genesis and and and that's kind of like a gardener tending the garden bringing bringing to full fruition is where that term leads us and our job as men and women is the people that we're involved with is to help them become all that they can be before God but especially for us men is to present our brides as an unblemished beautiful beautiful creature that that God made her to be before God our job is to love them the way Jesus loved the way Jesus loves and and and the model is how did Jesus love well he died he he actually gave himself up for her to make to make holy to cleanse her with water and within the word to present her without stain wrinkle or blemish he wants us to love her as ourselves that's Jesus model and so when it comes to our relationships that's what godly commitment kind of looks like are we really committed to this person that God has given us in our life this is true also with our children but even beyond the family here's what godly commitment looks like in 1 Peter 2 12 to 17 here's what godly commitment is is looking like and what God's calling us to do beyond family he's saying live such good lives among the pagans that though they accuse you of doing wrong which they do they may see your good deeds and glorify God in the day of visitation the day he visits us and then it goes on to say this submit yourselves for the Lord's sake to every authority instituted among men whether to the king as the supreme authority or to the governors who are sent by him to punish those who do wrong and to commend those who do right for it is God's will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish men so God's calling us to obey the authorities now now you you need to draw the line when the authorities are the people that you're obeying or causing you to do things that are ungodly of course but for the most part God has put these systems in place and especially now what's going on in our world guys we really need to heed what the what people are saying to us again unless it is purely dark and evil but in in most cases that's not going to be what is happening so we need to really consider that because for it is God's will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish men live as free men but do not use your freedom as a cover up for evil live as servants of God show proper respect to everyone love the brotherhood of believers fear God honor the king uh i wish i had more time to unpack those those verses they're they're pretty powerful and what they're really setting up is there what they're saying is that uh people will respond to what they see more than they will by the words that you speak um it was um uh who was it a very famous quote that uh uh you know go out and witness to people and if necessary use words i don't remember the actual person who said that but go out and witness the people if necessary use words people it's not about our words it's about what people see in our behavior the way we treat each other in our family the commitments we make and as they're being lived out people will see that and they'll go wow wow that that's a person who doesn't compromise that's a person who's on the right track that's that's the kind of person when you're that kind of person that will draw people to jesus in you not necessarily you they're going to see jesus in you so um godly conviction and godly commitment together means this i believe god's word is true and will not compromise i will not compromise i believe god is in control listen not me okay i am a man or woman of my word i will keep my word i am becoming more obedient in getting control over the sin in my life okay that's not going to happen overnight guys but if i'm making a commitment to do this you're going to see progress over time and i love others unconditionally and again if you're a man of godly compassion and conviction by the time you get the godly commitment that's a lot easier so as i bring this to a close on a scale of one to ten in the area of godly commitment how do you think you're doing how would you rate yourself in all of these areas it's a challenge consider that some discussion questions you might want to come up and talk about with maybe some other folks in your group am i driven more by my politics or the word of god that's a big question guys i don't know that's a challenge especially in today's world where politics is driving so much of the dialogue okay am i driven more by my politics and the belief system i have there do i make bigger commitments in that area than i do for god okay how would i rate my current knowledge of god's word how how intimate with you uh with god with god's word are you do you know his word does my life reflect the right perspective am i giving my best even uh if no one is watching no one is looking at you am i that's what a real commitment is guys is what people do character is what people do when no one is watching that's a good test is my life off course uh do i need to fire off a retro rocket what must i do to get back on course so those are some discussion questions i really encourage you guys to consider godly commitment where are you and then um the next session which we're going to do next monday will be godly confidence uh and confidence is something that's so so lacking in the body of christ today and i really believe it's because we're not processing through these first three c's and then ultimately we want to become people of godly courage which we'll talk about next wednesday so until next monday i pray that this is a blessing for you guys and that you will drill down on some of these questions this video will be posted it's about a 20 minute video you can go and and see it anytime you want it'll also be uploaded to my youtube channel so lord i just pray for all of my dear friends and for those any around the world actually that will be viewing this bless them lord help them to take those one or two precious nuggets of truth that you intended just for their ears as they um as they listen and watch this session and i pray that you'd water them by your holy spirit and you'd help them to grow in the richness of their relationship with you that they might reflect the life and love of your son jesus within their own sphere of influence and i thank you for that i thank you for these precious ones bless them and keep them safe in jesus name and all god's kids said amen love you guys see you monday