Paul Stanley
November 29, 1941—Thanksgiving Day 2020
And the servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient. 2 Tim 2:24
I met Paul Stanley in the early 90’s after moving to Colorado Springs with the ministry of Every Home For Christ. He stands as one of the most amazing men I have ever had the privilege to call my friend. What drew me to him was his dedication to building leaders—Paul demonstrated through his life what it means to be a servant leader in ways I had not previously seen. I call it Inside-Out Leadership. The kind of leadership that emanates from a tender heart submitted to the greatest leader of all time—Jesus.
Around 2008 I was tasked with producing a plan for ministry to men in the local church that would serve as a model for a local mega church here as well as a templet that could be used by churches anywhere. My plan was to extend an invitation to eleven other men who would form a team of twelve that consisted of three men for each of four different life-stage age groups. The plan was to meet weekly for at least one year before putting our plan on paper. I wanted us to become to each other first what we intended to reproduce.
Paul Stanley was an anchor for this team. We met every week for a year and then went away for a powerful three-day retreat into the local mountains to put our plan together. To this day that plan is being used by countless churches virtually around the world. It has life because it was birthed organically and not organizationally. I still remember leaders who were blown away by listening to Paul’s segment of our roll-out presentation.
Then, late Winter/early Spring 2010 I was putting together a major men’s ministry leadership conference in Colorado Springs for the National Coalition Of Ministry To Men (NCMM) at Glen Erie, headquarters for The Navigators where Paul worked for so many years. I will never forget this event. Over 100 of the most noted men’s ministry and denominational leaders from around the world were there. We were even hosted by Dr. James Dobson at Focus On The Family for a special luncheon. That led to our doing back-to-back broadcasts on their radio program the following week.
Because I was coordinating the event I asked Paul Stanley to be our opening plenary speaker. That opening morning was so very special on so many levels. I arrived late as I was visiting my wife at her rehab center that morning. Just a few weeks earlier after spending several months in intensive care we were told that Cindy would not survive. I remember on this morning having some hope for the first time. Her recovery was a true miracle.
So, after some opening remarks and welcoming, I had the privilege of introducing my friend Paul Stanley. I assumed not many of those in attendance knew Paul. However, as Paul walked up after my intro I noticed some strange murmuring and body language from many who were in the audience. It was a reaction I was not able to understand until after Paul was done and one of the most powerful illustrations of leadership I have ever witnessed.
You see, unknown to me, when most of these leaders entered the Great Hall that morning they had already met Paul. Paul greeted everyone who entered as he set up virtually all the chairs in that ballroom. He never mentioned who he was other than to give his name. He simply kept on setting up chairs and engaging these men in meaningful conversation as he did. Most of these leaders thought Paul was part of the facility setup team or on the janitorial staff. When they observed this precious man moving toward the podium to deliver the opening message they were blown away.
It was not until after Paul finished and many of these leaders approached me that I discovered what really happened. These men were not impacted by the powerful message that Paul brought, though it truly was. They were impressed by Paul. You see, on that morning Paul Stanley was a man who needed no introduction. He was already known. Not by accolades or his resume, but rather, who he is. Paul’s talk that morning was on leadership. His audience experienced the essence of his message long before he uttered his first words from that podium.
Look again at our opening verse, 2 Tim 2:24 And the servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient. To these leaders it was obvious that Paul was gentle, obviously able to teach and most of all, patient and kind. The introduction was not necessary nor was it called for on Thanksgiving Day when Paul approached the throngs in Heaven around God’s Throne who were applauding and welcoming him into the presence of his King.
My prayer for all of us is that we can take away from this incredible man’s story some implications for us. Are we becoming the kind of men and women that need no introduction? Or, do we need to remind people of our resumes and accomplishments? For me, the desire of my heart is to become the kind of man, like my friend Paul, who demonstrates the life and love of Jesus to everyone I encounter.

Where do we go from here?
This will be my last communication with you before our 2020 national election.
Have you ever wondered how our society arrived at this challenging and tumultuous time?
Some quotes from people who call themselves Christian—
As I write this Cindy and I are celebrating our 55th wedding anniversary.
Since the fall of man there has been a war raging for the souls of all human beings.
Many years ago I had the privilege of speaking in one of our country’s largest African-American churches.
No passion so effectually robs the mind of all its powers of acting and reasoning as FEAR
Matt 10:27
Lamentations 3:22-23
20/20…Year Of The Blind
Over thirty years ago I found myself speaking to a group of high school seniors on what was called career day.
The Kingdom of God 

O come let us adore Him. These words continue to resound in my heart this Christmas season. 
It was one of those unforgettable moments in early 2010. I was driving to the hospital on my way to visit Cindy ( now there for over three months mostly in a coma). Although I had been processing the whole idea of believing and expecting, I never-the-less went into a period of intense whining at the thought of losing my wife. I am a good whiner—some might say even a professional. It was during a particularly dark time in this lenghty ordeal with my beautiful wife’s life-threatening illness. In the midst of my complaining He spoke. It was a tender voice that I knew immediately was my precious Lord. He said, Vince do you have anything in your life for which you are thankful?
Lately I have done some extensive reading and a little research on how whole societies and countries have been overtaken, conquered. In man’s earliest days the methods were always physical. It took massive and well equipped and trained armies—in other words—physical force.
I am privileged to join with over forty men's ministry leaders from around the country in the production of what may be the most significant gathering of best practices for ministry to men to date. I have co-labored with many of these fine contributors for over 25 years now and respect their work.
One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24 (NIV)
Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses. Proverbs 27:5-6 (NIV)
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. John 15:12-13 (NIV)
As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17 (NIV)
Before I begin, a brief caution is called for. While this article is directed toward Christian men it is not intended to minimize the importance of, or responsibility given, to Christian women. I am dealing with men first, because they are the primary focus of our ministry, but particularly out of a deep understanding of the importance God places upon us to lead our families with spiritual wisdom and authority.
I do not believe in the God of theology who rewards good and punishes evil
Man makes himself God through pride, God makes Himself man through humility. -Jacques Benigne Bossuet
The Word says it is the Holy Spirit that produces life.
We have become ideological slaves and practical cowards…How did this happen?
“To find Majesty in the manger is the miracle. Never allowing the Child to grow up is another thing.” T.J.H.